I haven’t been on here for quite some time. I have gone back to writing in my hardback journal for a variety of reasons. But today, I am feeling the pull to put my words on the internet for others to experience if they so desire.
This entry is to mark the passage of time and why it is a special day to me. I will not reflect on moments but more of a general state of being.
New Year’s Eve/Day is the most special day of the year and I feel it holds the most power over any other. At least, that is what I feel. Surely others feel the same. Perhaps they are not conscience of it but they feel it nonetheless.
There are other holidays, of course, that on the surface, seem to be more important to other individuals, families, and cultures. I don’t discount the power of those days but New Year Eve/Day is a singularly powerful moment.
I honestly don’t know the history of the new year celebration, although I am sure I could do a quick search and figure it out. All I can tell you is what I am sensing in the moment the year turns over and the hours following.
On this day, more so than any other, the vast majority of individuals are zeroed in and focused on one precise moment, moving the individual conscience into one collective conscience. Obviously, this does not happen in one singular moment due to the differing time zones. But I can certainly feel the wave of energy wash over the world and others can to, although some may not be actively aware of it. We all feel it in one way or another
It is an energy that is simultaneously mixed with a release and a renewal. Joy with a touch of sadness and relief.
There are numerous traits that mark Us as distinctively human but the one I am thinking of in this moment is our habit of marking the passage of time. Animals exist in the moment. Plants live in the now. Energy just exist without awareness of what was or what will be. Humans dream of a future as well as lamenting the past. Humans hope, dread, dream, wish, and set their intentions for how life SHOULD be according to their individual expectations. We mark our passage of time, observe where we were, where we are, and where we are going in life and time.
New Year celebrations is a world wide celebration of exactly this. Saying goodbye to the Old and saying hello to the New. Celebrating the Past, Present, and Future.
When the collective conscience turns their focus to one precise moment I become acutely aware of the magnificence of it all. I tingle, I become excited, and I nearly vibrate with the power of it. It doesn’t matter if I am in public surrounded by others or if I am sitting on my couch all alone. In that precise moment I feel the energy creeping towards me, washing over me, and ebbing away.
And right now, at 11:38 am on January 1, I feel the afterglow. No, I don’t feel the hangovers or the disappointment from those who weren’t kissed but I feel the collective relief of letting 2018 go, the relief of the pressure from the past two weeks of being over, and the collective hope and positive intentions for 2019.
This feeling, of course, will wane as others become focused on their individual worlds but that is fine with me. I, too, look forward to building my world for 2019.
I honestly feel as if 2018 was my best year. I have finally found peace. I no longer fight life. I found a passion that was always resting below the surface, and I see the world in a new light. More importantly, I am able to see myself in a new light.
I am thankful for what I have as well as for what I don’t have. But mostly I am grateful for the future. That I HAVE a future.
I can now see my future! No, I don’t know what WILL come to pass but I now know that something will come to pass.
For too long I existed in a rather primal world. I more closely identified with the animals and plants within nature. Existing in the moment and not aware of what could be or what will be. I know what I wanted/needed in that moment and I went after it with no care as to what I may want/need later. To me, there was no later.
I feel as if I have moved past the primal way of life into more of a celestial way of life. Of course, I have one foot in the old world and I probably always will. I have wants and needs that I will never deny myself but I am looking at the bigger picture, so to speak. I now look through the eyes of light, love, and compassion more than ever. I have turned inward in order to turn outward.
The New Year Celebrations have come to a close and the world steadily marches forward oblivious to our desire to mark the passage of time. Now we retreat into our individual consciousness once again in order to move forward with our life that we have created. Only to come back in one year and experience that moment all over again.
Enduring the Swirl 